Spelunky

Game Title: Spelunky
Released: August 8, 2013
Game Length: 16 Hours
Grade: C

Expectations: This is a very old game that I never got around to playing. After seeing its sequel come across my news feed, I figured I would finally give it a chance. No doubt this game has run for a couple dollars in quite a few bundles in the past. The thing I didn't know was that this "high-definition" version of the game wasn't the first one to come out. Its creator actually released the freeware version way back in 2008. The file size was 9.5MB! Clearly he updated the game in its 2013 release with better graphics, new items, and a 4-player multiplayer mode. I have this weird feeling that it is going to take me awhile to discover all the hidden mechanics tucked away in the game's engine.

Reality: I discovered in this game that dying is part of the fun. What killed you is just as important as how far you will go. The list of possible ways to die is incredible - fall damage, spikes, arrow traps, monsters, spiders, wasps, aliens, giant balls of doom, stray bombs, boomerangs, and skeletons is probably only half of the things I died from. You only get 5 hearts from the start and something simple as landing on some spikes will kill you instantly. If you don't die right away, being stunned for a few seconds brings calamity to your doorstep. I like the fact that you can walk through spikes without getting hurt. Just don't fall on them. Many talk about a haunting ghost coming after you, but he only shows up if you twiddle your thumbs on the same floor for around 5 minutes. If by chance you manage to grab the Damsel in Distress and bring her to the exit, she will increase your health one point. Sometimes I accidentally use the girl as a projectile weapon, whenever she isn't running around screaming because you put her down for a moment.

Shopkeeper: I learned pretty quickly not to mess with the Shopkeepers. If anything makes them mad, they will zip around like they were on steroids shooting a barrage a bullets from their shotgun. Even taking their picture with your newly-bought camera is considered an insult. If you dropped a golden idol on their doorstep, they will steal it from you. If you manage to bypass them, they will show up again-and-again with their shotgun ready by the exit. Although there is a lot of fun things to buy, I don't recommend getting anything that you have to lug around. Getting the Climbing Gloves to hop-jump walls or Compass to know which side the exit is are two items worth getting. Buying a kiss (that provides one heart) from a Kissing Booth can also help. It isn't like you are going to live long enough to do much with the money anyways.

Hidden Tunnels: There are 4 floors for each of the 4 areas. If you make it to the next area, there is a chance you will find your friend wanting supplies. You must die and reach this point with the needed supplies each time so that you can start your rounds in the next zone. A bomb, a rope, and ten thousand coins wasn't that bad for the first shortcut. The second tunnel was a little more difficult but still doable with 2 bombs, 2 rope, and a shotgun. The third tunnel required 3 bombs, 3 ropes... and a golden key from the Mines? That would mean you have to start from the beginning, carry the one and only golden key around the third stage through every exit, and complete all 12 floors without dying. Forget it! I'm done.

The game doesn't record your total played time, but I can do a little bit of math. If my longest session was less than 10 minutes and about a quarter of them lasted under a minute each, then my 66 deaths must have totaled around 4 hours. No wonder IGN called Spelunky The Root of All Evil.

 

11-12-2020